Each year in America alone, nearly 1 million marriages end in divorce.This is an incredible number! That would be as if all the citizens of Houston Texas were divorced (each divorce leaves 2 people).
The question is how many of those marriages could be saved. Unfortunately, that is an invisible number. If your marriage stays together, it is hard to find in the statistics. As Marian Wright Edelman wrote, statistics are stories with the tears washed off.
Can your marriage be saved? If I could answer that, I would be a wealthy man. I can tell you that if your marriage is in trouble and you do nothing, the outcome is guaranteed. If you do something, there is a much better chance that your marriage will be saved.
And I can tell you, in four simple steps what you can do to save your marriage. You can start right now. But you must understand that I said "simple." That is not the same as "easy." These steps are not easy. They do, however, give you a path that you must follow if you want to change the destiny of a marriage in trouble.
Dec 30, 2011
Dec 10, 2011
When was the last time you and your husband laugh together? If I had not done this habit, you should return the joy of relationships through humor or humorous stories.
According to marriage expert John Gottman, founder of the Gottman Institute in Seattle, USA, one of the recipes lasting marriage is a relationship marked by humor and filled with laughter. Because, when the couple laughing together, they drain the positive energy to each other.
Humor, it can evoke mood. When the mood was chaotic, humor or jokes can change the feeling of sadness, anger, hate to be a relaxed feeling. You can both laugh out loud, automated stress disappear.
Unfortunately, this time not a few marriages are forgetting 'strength' of humor. Especially, when the burden of taking care of baby, and growing housing needs. Whereas, when humor 'buried', the burden will be felt more heavily, the result appears in the tension between the two of you, who actually triggered the conflict.
But, do not worry. You and your husband still can, return the humor in marriage. Do it again honed sense of humor therapy. Not as difficult as imagined, because the humor or laughter is like a virus that can spread quickly to the people around you.
If you want to bring a healthy humor in your marriage, try the following trick:
- Involve the humor in everyday conversation. That way, no matter how the problem can be felt light. The easiest one is laughing at something that you experience. Either that, everyday events in the office, when traffic jams on the road or at home.
- Avoid sarcasm humor, and charged SARA. Avoid jokes too sensitive, and could offend a husband, for example about the job positions that have not been well promoted or earnings that are smaller than you.
- Collect stories, riddles or rhymes funny from magazines, newspapers or internet.Write on paper, then put in the fridge. When you or your husband want to take something from the fridge, you both can accidentally read the funny story. At least, it could make you smile
Dec 9, 2011
If you need divorce advice, then this article is for you. Many divorcing couples have their lives ruined by the divorce process simply by making these 3 simple mistakes. Read on to find out what these mistakes are, how to avoid them, and how to arrive at that elusive amicable divorce.
Mistake #1 - Expecting It To Be Easy
Some people think divorce will be easy -- after all, they went through marriage first. Well, news flash -- it's NOT easy! In fact, marriage is easy compared to what's waiting for you in the divorce process. It's definitely going to be tough for you, your spouse, and your children.
You'll have arguments with your spouse. You'll be dealing with expensive lawyers -- two of them. You'll be worrying about your kids and how the divorce will affect them. You'll worry about who's getting what, who'll take care of the children, where to move... bottom line is, it's not going to be easy, so don't expect it to be.
Mistake #2 - Expecting It To Be Quick
It's not going to be easy, and it definitely won't be quick, especially if you let your lawyers do all the dirty work. If you and your spouse let your lawyers battle it out for you, you're safely looking at at around 18 months of "negotiations" before you reach a middle ground everyone's happy with.
But the bad thing about such a long divorce process is that it drains your finances like nothing else. Even if the divorce does push through, you and your spouse will be left with less disposable income than you'd like, which makes life after divorce a little harder to get used to.
Mistake #3 - Not Having A Support Group
Thirdly, and this is no mystery, divorce is stressful. And it's a huge mistake not to have a support group to help you get through it. You'll need friends and family to support you during these tough times.
You may also want certain professionals in your support group, such as counselors, pastors, or divorce professionals. And speaking of divorce professionals, let's move on to:
The Solution
Want to avoid these 3 mistakes? Then do yourself a favor and hire a divorce mediator. This divorce professional is impartial and works both with you and your spouse, taking into account the wishes of both sides and working out an agreement.
The divorce mediator's goal is to make your divorce happen as easily, quickly, and stress-freely as possible. Letting one mediator handle the negotiations instead of two lawyers will save you loads of money, leaving both you and your spouse with more disposable income to work with after the divorce is finalized.
Discover How Good It Feels To Be Cherished By a Man Who Adores You
What are the essential ingredients in an ideal relationship? In the middle of a workshop recently a pertinent question was asked about what creates the ideal relationship. We were asked to think of a relationship we had with something in the last week that in one's mind was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal. A number of men in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these things felt comfortable, and simple.
The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and easy to maintain. A number of women considered kitchen appliances, favorite clothes or shoes, old friends, neighbours, and treasured items in their lives, and the bond that they had created either between people or with items they used in their lives. Words such as reliable, dependable, and comforting were used. When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has very simple needs, requiring only food, shelter, and love. No matter how my day has been or what kind of mood I'm in, when I get home at night and I'm greeted in such an authentic, transparent, and enthusiastic fashion. My dog is always excited to see me, and it's very humbling when you consider it. I don't know of any others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from the house or no matter how my day has been. His needs are few, yet he gives so much. I call this unconditional love. So what is unconditional love? Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for your partner when the romantic, hollywood-style love is gone.
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